ElectricTangerine

Oh Thanksgiving, you saucy thing…you’ve thrown my schedule into complete disarray, but I can’t be mad at you. So while I’m riding my L-tryptophan high, let’s talk some smack about this week’s episode…

I don’t know why exactly, but this week’s episode just didn’t thrill me. I noticed there was a lot of grey and brown in this week’s designs which seemed to sum up a certain attitude among the contestants. The energy was just not there. No interesting repartee. No funny chatter, no engagement, no slap fights…nothing. Although I noticed Ricky still found something to cry about. Maybe the convex head that I’m convinced he’s hiding under his hats gives him “excessive water works” superpowers.

Contributing to my overall “ehhh” take on things, I have a terrible admission to make…one which I’m sure will call into question my status as a member of the Stereotypical Gay Boys Club, but here goes: I am indifferent on the whole SJP issue. I’ve never understood the whole ka-fuffle over Sarah Jessica Parker or “Sex In The City.” I watched all of Season One while I worked in my studio a few years ago, because everyone and their dog assured me that it was a phenomenal show and I didn’t get it. It was an ok show, but it just didn’t thrill me. So seeing that the “mystery fashion icon” guest was SJP similarly didn’t thrill me. Has she always had that big chin mole, by the way? I couldn’t decide whether I’d just overlooked it before or if it was a recent thing or what, but I was distracted by it for the whole show.

I did like the way she stressed the fact that the winner of this week’s challenge may be picked up as part of Bitten’s line. I can respect the fact that SJP thinks highly enough of her line to retain the right to refuse to carry something just because it won a challenge. What if it’s the best of a bad lot? Nice job hedging your bets there, Sarah Jessica.

Speaking of shameless self promotion, I was torn between admiration and disgust at the way that Carmen ran her “remember my name, beeyotch!” schtick on SJP as she was pitching her designs. On the one hand, as a self employed creative type, I know that you have to promote yourself and do your own marketing, get out there and hustle et cetera. But on the other, it seemed a bit on the high gauche side and I thought SJP looked faintly embarrassed by her spiel. It was a little too used car salespitchy for me.

The challenge this week had some serious restrictions placed on it. Fifteen dollars is not a lot of money anywhere these days, but doubly so at a place like Mood Fabrics. Yes, it’s a designer discount store, but there’s a limit to how much you can keep the “discount” and still remain “designer.”

The low price ceiling is probably why I thought so many of the designers pieces screamed “I got it at Ross!” this week.

The Winner

- with ’s help. When I first saw Victorya’s sketches, I wasn’t very hopeful about the way the dress would turn out. It looked like the mutant offspring of Sailor Moon and 1960’s maternity wear. I was pleasantly surprised by the finished piece. I agreed with Tim that the palette was sophisticated. Victorya and Kevin really showed up the other contestants in their color choices by using the same warm tones and greys that some of the other used, but pairing the tones brilliantly so that they didn’t look dull and boring. The short jacket vest brought the piece up a notch and I thought the scooped back worked beautifully. Visual interest, high wearability factor and a good shape? Victorya deserved this win.
Although I will say this…I still don’t get or like the gynormous bows and flowers that Victorya insists on sticking on all of her pieces thus far. I didn’t feel like the type of woman who’d be buying that dress would necessarily be thrilled with having a great big bow on her neck. When I first saw her model from the back, I groaned because all I saw was tiny model neck and big ole bow. Hopefully Victorya will break from this convention next week, otherwise I might have to stop liking her.

and - Theirs was my second favorite dress if for no other reason than the fact that the rich raspberry color was so delightful. Especially in contrast to all the brown, brown, grey and grey. I thought the neckline on this piece was especially pretty and I liked the way it moved. I couldn’t see whether or not it had a handkerchief hem or not, but I suppose I’d like it even if it did. It still bore the faint whiff of “lingerie designer” though. It was almost a nightgown, even with the belt. I wasn’t crazy about the belt or the way that Ricky stuck it right under the model’s breasts, giving her a kind of de facto empire waist. And as everyone has said already…Ricky, stop with the constant crying!!
And Jack…I am all about flamey men embracing their inner torch, but you look like you’re channelling Guy Pierce from “Priscilla Queen of the Desert.” You might want to drop the volume a notch.

and
were a big disappointment for me. What a boring ensemble to come from those two! I expect more verve, more zest, more COLOR from those two. Where was the Va-voom in this design? It’s a sweater over leggings and in dull colors at that. I liked the c-shaped pockets on the front of the sweater, but I’m never a big fan of boat necks on skinny girls. Putting a beret on that outfit doesn’t save it from looking like…well…leggings and a long sweater.
Does anyone else remember those stores that cropped up in Malls around the country around…oh let’s see…1990 or so? I think they were called “Units” and all they sold were jersey knit leggings and big sweaters and big tops to go over them. This was what Kit and Chris’ design reminded me of. It’s the couture choice of schlumphy Saturday grocery shopping excursions, not really runway ready.
Overall I give it a “yawn” rating.

and
were similarly underwhelming. I figured Rami chose Jillian for his partner because she can sew and she’s not strong enough point-of-view wise to challenge his vision at any point, so I was extremely let down to see that shapeless, boring and frankly unflattering outfit walk out and down the runway. Another leggin’s and large top ensemble, only this one reminded me more of the cover-ups that I’ve seen women wearing as they get their hair done in high end salons. It’s not a plastic cape, but it’s one step up from that. It made the model look matronly and the colors bored me to tears.
Another “yawn” rating.

and - I have to hand it to them, they were the most interesting thing about this episode. Crazy Elisa is still crazy, although I am starting to get the sense that she’s crazy in a particular way which I’ve seen when I’ve run into fabric and wearble art artists as opposed to fashion designers. I tend to think this is where Elisa needs to be…someplace where wearability and execution take second place to unique perspective and artistic vision. That observation aside, spit marking fabric that another human being has to wear is disgusting. Always. There really are no exceptions to this rule. I thought Heidi’s expression when she heard about the spit marking was one of the best things about this episode.
Elisa needs to thank her lucky stars (or spirit guides, or Shirley McClaine or whatever) that Sweet P was her partner on this challenge because otherwise she’d have been toast. I’m guessing that Elisa doesn’t have much more mileage in her, crazy points or not. The woman can’t sew.
The dress they created had color and it moved well once you took the U-haul packing blanket cape off of it. I have this sneaking suspicion that Sweet P created most of the dress (or salvaged it) and Elisa created the U-haul blanket. I’m looking forward to seeing whether next week’s episode proves or disproves this theory.

and
- Again, a disappointment. I can forgive Christian somewhat for re-creating the “Simply Irresistible” Robert Palmer girls dress paired with the Michael Jackson jacket because he’s 21. To him, this is super Retro edginess. To a room full of people who were actually alive in the 80’s, not so much. Although I do want to shake Christian till his teeth rattle for batting away Tim Gunn’s excellent advice for a second week in a row. Honey, have you ever watched the show before you were on it? I’ll say it again - when Tim Gunn tells you something it’s in your best interests to listen. Carmen should’ve known better than to just put together that outfit. I can’t figure out whether she really thought it rocked or if it was a subtle form of sabotage, but I’m guessing the latter…crocodile tears notwithstanding.

and
- what a wretched, horrible THING their dress was. Stevie Knicks versus Pocahontas versus a weed whacker. It looked like a nasty old afghan with arm holes! I would’ve been embarassed to have such a thing viewed anywhere, but they let that atrocious thing go down the runway! Steven would’ve probably known this outfit was heinous if he could be bothered to open his eyes at any point during the episode. His squinchy eyed, tight mouthed demeanor is really starting to grate on me. Open the mouth, sunshine. And don’t smoke so much weed right before taping your confessional.

Auf’d

and deservedly so. Who doesn’t know that knits will grow as you sew them? The belted burlap sack look might’ve gone over well in Dickensian England (which is where he appears to get most of his sartorial ideas..note the Oliver Twist hat) but it ain’t gonna work here.